1. Hot Apple Cider

2. Scarves & Sweaters

3. Crunchy, Colorful Leaves

4. Hay Rides!

5. Pumpkin Carving

6. Football Games

7. Boots!

8. Seasonal Lattes

9. Cuddling without sweating.

10. Bonfires =)

DISCLAIMER: I wrote this about a year ago, and just found it. Still think its relevant, Enjoy.

Dear Christina,

I think you have a beautiful voice, and I must admit a very good-looking body (at least you used to). However, your latest music video for “Not Myself Tonight” was the last and final straw in a game where you ended up short.

When we first met, with Genie in a Bottle, you were a sweet sounding, seemingly-innocent young blonde, who might get freaky with her boyfriend late at night. Today, I can assure you if I had known the true nature of the Genie, I never would have rubbed the lamp. Yes, I do understand Britney Spears may have been a strong example of the good girl gone awry (considering we all know how she turned out), but it is no excuse for taking your Whorendousness (yes, I went there) to such an extreme level, twice. Did the failure the first time not teach you anything? I’m not sure how to put this, but blinged out ball-gags and latex rompers really creep me the fuck out.

Besides the usual faux-lesbian scenes, scantily clad ensemble, and the raunchy dance moves, the only difference between this video and the mistake formerly known as “Dirty” is the lack of a struggling rapper to aid in your pelvic thrusts (No offense, Redman).

I’m not sure if your target audience is supposed to be young impressionable teenage girls or just their fathers? At this point, all I know is that “Dirty” was an unmerciful, catchy tune that could get stuck in your head; therefore I thank you for making your latest release such a shitstorm I don’t even remember the lyrics.

Much Love,

Ale Cat